He also stares at him, this apparition with the innocently impudent mouth. Todd stares at the thing which the assistant has dropped in his basket, which is cream-colored and shaped like a milk bottle with a glittery silver bottle-cap. It’s a lot softer – trust me, you’ll thank me for it later.” But, no – you need something that will moisturize. Though it’s a pity, because the blue would bring out your eyes. “No, this one has a high level of salt in it and salt would wreak havoc on your skin, which is already tending towards dry. “What? Oh, no, not the basket, the bath bomb – do keep up, sir,” the assistant scolds him, effectively stunning Todd into a silence that lasts long enough for the assistant to launch into another small monologue. Certainly not on a perilously dodgy raft surrounded by the circling fins of ravenous sharks.” The assistant pauses to take a breath, and to shove a shopping basket into Todd’s hands. Not that I’ve never been in the middle of the ocean, of course. “It turns the water so blue that you’d think you were the middle of the ocean. “Ooh, that’s one of my favourites!” The assistant re-materialisesnext to him as Todd doubtfully eyes a tray of something bright blue. At least, that’s what Todd assumes is happening – an assumption which soon turns out to be hopelessly naive. The shop assistant says something vague and obnoxiously cheery and leaves him to it, never bothering Todd again. He wills his body to camouflage into the rows of fluorescent yellow and acid green. He tries to melt away, stepping around the shop’s central display, which is a double-sided island of shelves, lined with crates filled with heavily scented bathing goods. Todd forces himself not to visibly recoil, or perhaps burst into what would be very embittered laughter. For someone special.” The man, who has the kind of face that better suits the word ‘boy,’ waggles his eyebrows at Todd. You know, if you wanted to get something. “Sure, sure, whatever you like – though you should know that we’re having a hugesale on massage bars. So he’s a little terse when he replies with his line of the customer-employee shopping script, “Just browsing. He doesn’t need to say it like that, Todd thinks reproachfully. “Anything I can help you with, or just browsing?” He follows it up with Todd’s least favorite sentence to hear in public. Here’s Todd, minding his own goddamn business in this stupid bath store, trying with every inch of his being to give off a vibe that says ‘ nobody look at me or I will spontaneously combust,’ when a man bounds out from behind the counter, smiles blithely, and proceeds to stretch ‘hi’ into at least three syllables. It makes for a pretty terrible first impression. fic is completely drafted and I'll publish a chapter each week.Heartfelt examination of the complex road to healing and confidence I guess.Dirk is throwing himself at Todd and Todd is.
Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016).
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